You can’t be here, she tells me, her mocking voice, her stuck out tongue. Yeah, you can’t be here! another girl joins in, you’re not wanted here, won’t you learn? My eyes become downcast, I shuffle away, my upper back curved, I want to shrink, disappear, I’ll let them have the final say. [...]
Month: July 2020
Words Out Loud: My first performance in a spoken word podcast

This evening, Words Out Loud Ballarat held their podcast for the 2020 Melbourne Spoken Word Festival Online. I am so thankful and grateful to WOL to have been selected to be a part of the podcast, where I recite my piece, "Depression: A Realisation". Thank you to Jason and Kirstyn for the opportunity. This is [...]
Poem: Lovesick – 30/07/20

Lovesick… he yearns for you, he apparently cannot live without you. Darling, can’t you tell, won’t you comprehend, he much he needs you? This is not a truth which can be bent. But, my sweetheart, why does he need you? Where is he calling from – low, high, the hay, but my precious, [...]
Poem: Relocation – 30/07/20

Sometimes it’s positive to relocate, a subtle change of scene, a change of pace, being stagnant, stuck in the same room, same world for so long, it can drive me around the bend, four walls enclosing on me because they can do so with the slipperiest of ease, despite my view from above, the [...]
Poem: Fumbling Fawn – 28/07/20

I am struggling to rise to my little hooves, I am failing to grasp hold of balance, I am calling, calling, for this ability to visit me, the skill to be mobile, to be free. For so long, I’ve been unable to properly walk and stride, how problematic for a soul for whom the [...]
Poem: Already Departed – 27/07/20

I am sick to death of this draining, this haunted state of false reverie where I’m lulled into a state of dumbfound and airiness, because the flow, it has ceased, as I know it to be. Beautiful melodies once soared from my throat, from my lips, blustering blight, I’m not at all pardoned, from [...]
Poem: Flawless? – 27/07/20

Flawless, how can I feel flawless when beneath the spotted mirror my reflection barely lurks? Flawless, how can I feel perfect when my heart is blotchy like Grandma’s inky, moody pearls? A broken smile, a set of hounded eyes reflect back at me, finding a perfect circumstance? Tell me this: does perfection truly exist? [...]
Poem: Unspoken Reasons – 26/07/20

Don’t tell me why. Don’t avoid the how. Reveal the when. Tell me now. I must hear it. I’m telling you, you must breathe it, speak your whole truth. I beg of you: Why did you leave? Each time I saw you, afterwards, silence lingering. A hollow yawning, gaping in my chest, [...]
Poem: Demonise – 25/07/20

Don’t demonise me, I’ve lived and breathed my stone age, don’t victimise me, I have lasted longer than expected. Don’t terrorise me, my existence is not a myth, I was spoken of in tones so hissed, cackling, laughing, I need not confess anything to ancient, solemn priest. Annihilate me, in sweet moments in [...]
Poem: “Autobiographile” – Text and Spoken Word – 24/07/20

I have experienced this before and triumphed. I have ridden the tempestuous waves and reigned freely. I have arisen from the waking dead and become full of life, now an ability to see, to breathe. I have lived, and I have learned, and this is what I wish to be seen.