Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose

Tag: conscious awareness

  • Poem: An Abstract – 12/10/21

    Poem: An Abstract – 12/10/21

    Salient thoughts
    dangle from a thread.
    Sporadic, intermittent moments recalled,
    none I dread.
    I recount,
    with a sparkle in my eye,
    the times I was
    humoured, admired,
    entertained,
    and now I realise
    I didn’t need any of it –
    I am empowered.

    I can be on my own,
    not every hurried word
    or breath attended to,
    whether wise or nonsensical,
    every thought does not
    need tending to,
    I grew used to being humoured,
    admired, held in high esteem,
    but these were pieces of
    a puzzle I thought
    I truly did need.

    Certainly, initially,
    moments were bare, quiet,
    I wasn’t used to my
    lack of sound,
    but now I’m happy in
    my chosen silence,
    or with music, volumes, voices
    other than mine,
    they can abound,
    and really there is no
    peculiarity, nor need for
    perplexity to be
    revealed nor seen,
    the truth of the matter is
    I can be in complete solitude,
    alone but never lonely,
    occupied and ready
    and still feel like
    a queen.

    Need no suitors nor admirers
    to stroke, bolster the ego,
    what’s more –
    I will say,
    that this is my truth,
    and I must seek
    peacefulness more,
    I shall not allow it to go.

    For the inner peace
    which comes from
    true confidence grown from
    myself,
    not bred with another’s eyes, ears and words serving
    differing intents,
    themselves,
    why, this power is internal,
    amazing, borne of
    the truest of one’s entity,
    the inner strength,
    grown confidence,
    my own,
    fostered all by myself —
    independence is the true key.
    (06/10/21)

    Copyright © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
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    Previous Post: Springing Forth – 10/10/21

    Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose

  • Poem: Springing Forth – 10/10/21

    Poem: Springing Forth – 10/10/21

    I feel a sense of hope,
    of positivity and
    brightness,
    I need not want
    for anything
    because happiness,
    I already have it,
    it’s that glimmer of
    ostentatious gold
    which drips with
    wanton thread,
    grasping my eyes with its beauty,
    wonder to the skies to be had.
    This hope is already present,
    I finger it, golden beads,
    like rich fruit dripping from
    luscious mango trees,
    and here and now,
    with gentle abandon
    I will come undone,
    this superfluous yet entirely
    wanted feeling of joy
    springs forth,
    Hope, my friend, of you,
    I know.
    It’s not like anything I’ve
    experienced before,
    I cannot fathom this dire need
    that begged me to change, change, change
    for my outlook
    was pessimistic indeed,
    but with this glimmer,
    these shining drops of sparkling
    gold that I clutch
    tightly to my chest,
    I am happy,
    I am present,
    I smile without corners
    of my mouth trembling,
    I’m comfortable,
    and this is a fact.
    I can look each of you
    in the eye and tell you
    with conviction indeed
    that my heart is again
    beginning to blossom
    and I’m doing it,
    purposefully, on my own,
    with subtle ease,
    can’t deny myself from
    embracing happiness,
    joy,
    I won’t allow any to
    dampen my spirits,
    if you’ll let me,
    permit me to rise with you,
    together, discomfort,
    unease,
    we can conquer it.
    Bliss can only be
    but fingertips away,
    present, invisible in
    the moment,
    yet experiences waiting
    to be had
    day by day,
    it will only take
    introversion,
    delicacy,
    and confidence in myself,
    and telling myself
    I am worth it,
    there is always justification
    to further delve.
    (08/10/21)
    Copyright © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
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    Previous Post: Coagulate – 08/10/21

    Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose

  • Poem: Perhaps I’ll Change – 06/10/21

    Poem: Perhaps I’ll Change – 06/10/21

    Ordinarily,
    I’d change
    for the better,
    like I know I should.
    Glancing into a reflection,
    puddle, stigmatised mud,
    confounded,
    when shall I continue
    truthfully and good?
    I know,
    as I stare at myself
    that changes are to
    occur more often
    than not,
    but how hard
    will it be
    for us to move forward
    if certain thoughts
    cannot be wrought,
    or refashioned –
    remembering?
    I’d rather not.

    My heart pounds;
    is it caffeine or
    my fluctuations,
    my urge?
    A desire to rid myself,
    purge myself free
    from the scourge
    of daily intent,
    perfection in
    whatever forms
    must be revealed,
    must be seen,
    and I can only
    handle the odd,
    hollow feeling
    for a certain timed
    moment of what
    has already been.

    With my very own eyes,
    with that arresting gaze
    that meets mine,
    I can only understand
    the thought patterns if
    I were to purposefully
    put myself behind
    another’s guise,
    but is it warranted?
    To understand?
    Completely, wholly?
    My empty hands,
    fill them with
    useful knowledge so I can
    finally see?
    I don’t want to,
    need to know,
    no more shall I
    travel through pathways,
    neural journeys that
    I’ve already seen,
    done,
    gone,
    been.

    The past is a determiner for not
    resurrecting a future.
    I need no scenes.

    Copyright © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
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    Previous Post: Ignoring The Noises – 04/10/21

    Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose