Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose

Tag: poem

  • Poem: Languishing – 02/09/20

    Poem: Languishing – 02/09/20

    I tell myself
that everything will be okay,
but I languish in bed for hours.
I lie here, my consciousness aching away,
my stomach anxious as I wonder
not what the distant future will bring,
but the next minute, next seconds, next hours.

I do not know how to deal with this despair,
I practiced positivity these last days without a care,
but what’s settling in is this irrevocable gloom,
of unknowing, what will come,
or whether things will change at all soon.

It’s like looking up the steepest hill,
some would think, “Keep going” and keep aiming for the summit,
but I, I am exhausted,
and I’ve barely performed any exertion,
but mentally,
inside, it’s a circus.

These times are trying for many,
and I know this,
I’m not selfish for how I’m feeling,
and I understand that others are suffering,
perhaps I could reach out a hand,
then I remember we’re discouraged from this,
I must keep my distance,
but wait,
I’m already doing this.

These four walls which once seemed like luxury,
a newly-developed introvert’s home
are caving in on me,
I want to disappear,
but then it seems from the outside world
I’ve already achieved this.

© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

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  • Poem: Stutter – 02/09/20

    Poem: Stutter – 02/09/20

    I stutter out what I want from you,
my anger causes me to shake,
I’ve never been this rowdy before,
my confidence piques -
before I know it, I’ll inadvertently break.
 
What is it about you
and this situation that causes me to uncontrollably squirm?
I can only tell you partial truths of the circumstance,
I cannot allow you to wholly learn.
 
For the truth is more than simplicity,
more than duplicity,
more than duality,
more than contextualisation.
 
To put it simply, I must breathe out
every single speckle of you
because I cannot have the world learn
that you’ve taken over me,
truth be told,
no more,
never,
not again,
the chance of this happening again?
None.
 
The sound of a lonesome wren.  

© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
Photo by Mike Marrah on Unsplash

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  • Poem: Starry Eyed – 01/09/20

    Poem: Starry Eyed – 01/09/20

    They couldn’t help it,
they had stars in their eyes.
Bright burst of fireworks encapsulated in their sights,
little pin drops of explosions,
one by one they shine and shone,
filling their beings with life and fire,
delighting themselves,
fear, they had none.
 
What is it about confidence that oozes delectability?
And what is it about inner strength that speaks to not only them,
but me?
Because, I, as narrator of this tale,
I am also here to be affected,
lights and sounds within my view and ears,
can I share this, can I tell?
 
I am not the only one with stars in my eyes,
when I look at the those before me,
those who succeeded in their own style,
and the others who admire,
who view this situation for what it is,
entirely pleased be they,
it is involuntary.
 
Stars in our eyes,
this I’ll admit,
when I’m looking at us,
looking at it,
success is not an option,
success is the only way,
the ironic moment comes when I realise
I’ve been staring in the mirror with the others,
together,
the whole time, always.

© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
Photo by Daniel Lincoln on Unsplash

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  • Poem: Escape to a Land of Slumber – 31/08/20

    Poem: Escape to a Land of Slumber – 31/08/20

    I escape into a land of slumber,
where I softly achieve my goal,
to forget and feel nothing,
I am enveloped by reaching fingertips of
diamonds and solid gold.
 
They caress me with a richness
I’ve never known,
toy with me,
play with me,
these dancing hands I feel not,
though within them, I am at home.
 
I am deep in rest,
my back the fingers stroke,
and they play with my hair,
this escape is full of my hope,
because while I’m away in mind,
I am here and now,
though some would say my consciousness is not.
 
I relish these afternoon escapes,
the siestas which take me away
to a feeling of nothingness,
of wanted emptiness,
nothing here is awry,
nothing is astray.
 
And close to waking I experience
the most amazing thing,
I rouse slowly and recollect
remnants of a dream,
someone perhaps who I have missed
without realising?
Or perhaps I simply am recalling them fondly.
 
I rarely remember my dreams,
and when I do,
the fragment slips from memory,
perhaps the dream was a message,
or something else –
I nod knowingly –
maybe revelations will unfold naturally.

© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
Photo by cottonbro from Pexels

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  • Poem: Eclipsed – 30/08/20

    Poem: Eclipsed – 30/08/20

    You eclipsed yourself onto my heart,
etched yourself amongst Sun and stars,
a silhouette of burnished red and brown,
a luminescent glow of you all around.
 
Your pattern, your shape,
my mind recalls,
the beauty of your face,
your expression,
I’m in thrall,
and I remember the smiles we shared,
so many days and nights together,
I am basking in the memory of your glow,
ghostly light upon me thrown,
alabaster shine upon us both.
 
Hand in hand,
you took me into your view,
fingertips laced together,
we shone, reflections of youth,
and together we created an energy unseen
by the lower land,
eclipsing my heart as you
tightly grasped my hand.
 
What will happen, dear,
when we must part?
The irreconcilable moment when
hand leaves hand,
and hearts extract entwined valves
from each other,
for one must depart.
 
I know this time will come and to it,
I revolt, as I say,
I wish I could stay in your presence,
please don’t desert me,
please remain.
 
I cannot do this on my own,
I imagine myself sadly call,
I’ll gaze into your light,
continue to further fall, 
fall further, and fall into the night.

© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
Photo by JOSHUA COLEMAN on Unsplash

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  • Poem: My Body is a River – 30/08/20

    Poem: My Body is a River – 30/08/20

    My body is a river,
I rush over you,
soothing as a salve or balm,
running over your pebbles,
smoothing their jagged forms.
 
My delicate hands dance,
my currents rise and fall,
to you,
my body is a river,
with my flow
I can cure you of all.
 
Aching, yearning,
pain which must be departing,
despairing,
depression,
lonely,
to cleanse you of these is my calling.
 
So, my liquid licks and laps
against your shore,
the in-between where
hunger and pain are raw,
unknown, a certain calling,
your fingers reach for me,
I flush you with calm respite,
truthful news,
release from your gloom.
 
You no longer suffer,
you are brave
for having survived your internal ravaging,
but because my body is a river,
you were permitted this vital saving.

© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
Photo by Jessica Furtney on Unsplash

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  • Poem: They Called You Average – 28/08/20

    Poem: They Called You Average – 28/08/20

    So, they called you average.
What is 'average' anyway?
Are you going to let their taunts get in your way?
Or will you rise, will you soar above the judgments, their negativity?
For some though, they’re more inclined to sink
and this image is more than dreary.

Some hearts can break at the slightest twinge
of criticism,
the human twang of strummed attack,
average, average, average,
is this what you are?
No, my darling, my dear,
I’ll speak of their words as if I’m 
breaking forth from Criticism’s prison with ease.

Awaken at every moment that you’re challenged
about who you are,
average is as average does,
this you are not,
and let me tell you this:
these taunts are coming from afar.

They are nonsense,
they are preying upon your insecurities,
in fact, can you now hear the echoes of their words
within the reverberation of your quiet words,
their intentions clearly seen?

Because to bring another down is cowardly and unkind,
why use such words with such power
to cause a sense of worthlessness,
a light removed from their eyes?
The shine of self-confidence and hope can sadly lose their gleam.

But average you are not,
never,
you outshine those letters arranged and intended cruelly,
hear my words instead,
you are amazing and strong and true,
allow your confidence to rise through and through.

© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
Photo by Houcine Ncib on Unsplash

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  • Poem: Finding the Inner Strength – 26/08/20

    Poem: Finding the Inner Strength – 26/08/20

    I am stronger than I perceive myself to be,
even with the massive doubts I cast upon me,
I am not withering inside,
shadows covering my soul,
no, I am strong,
almost invincible.

I am positive,
even though I wonder and question my skills,
I am wise even if I’m struggling,
I can make it through this,
stand erect,
proudly,
I will, I will, I will.

Heaven knows how hard I am trying to 'be',
trying to make it through struggles,
my internal catastrophes.

I will wear a smile,
stop asking others so many questions,
for guidance, assurance,
validation,

I will become the confident woman I still am,
not once was, but who I am still,
I will direct myself through life stridently,
with my wooden oars,
glide elegantly through the current, I will.

I’ll guide this rowboat on a path of my own,
I’ll stop this nonsense swimming in my head,
this overwhelming self-doubt,
and I’ll convince myself that there’s nothing to fear,
I will make it through these trying times,
just watch me, my dears.

© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
Photo by Patrick Hendry on Unsplash

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  • Poem: After a Burst of Positivity – 25/08/20

    Poem: After a Burst of Positivity – 25/08/20

    It doesn’t matter how bad life gets,
hope can still trickle into view,
positivity like a painted, beaming smile
on a canvas reminding us that
a positive perspective is the
correct view.
 
No need to succumb to despair,
I know it can be difficult
but know there will always be at least someone there
with a shine in their eyes,
an offered brightness to your day.
 
And then with you,
an ability to look outside of yourself,
not introvert,
but bloom,
share what’s within
our hearts, our minds,
what they have to say.
 
Do not view yourself in the negative light
some may wish to behold,
brighten, with hope,
you’ve so many tales to share and tell,
 
Broaden your horizons
further than just your despair,
because, in doing so,
you can inspire others to reach out
from their pains,
this can be accomplished almost anywhere.

© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
Photo by Lesly Juarez on Unsplash

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  • Poem: Aloud – 24/08/20

    Poem: Aloud – 24/08/20

    These four walls are like a haven
but to some, they could be misconstrued as a prison.
I choose to reside here, taking my meals and my naps,
 
speaking at length, researching, creating, typing in bursts,
it is my little home, it is my little world,
and I only leave when I’ve need to –
 
I’m isolating myself, I know.
 
I should be downstairs,
spending time with my others,
socialising, eating together, taking tea together and our suppers,
 
but I somehow just want to be alone,
I reach out when I feel on my own,
but, the fact of the matter is, I’m learning to like my own company.
 
No desperate yearning for an unknown other,
to fulfil my life, to make me feel as though
I’m emotionally satisfied,
 
no ongoing calls to different people to
find the right one
in fact, I have enough love in my world to peruse,
 
and while alone, I can be whoever, whatever I want,
no need to put on false pretenses,
I can read, I can sleep with ease,
 
and the truth is that I know I won’t be judged
for spending time alone,
this is how I am getting to know myself.
 
And I’m really enjoying it,
I have to say this
aloud.

© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
Photo by Leohoho on Unsplash

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