Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose

Tag: reflection

  • Prose: Perseverance, a Reflection – 22/01/20

    Prose: Perseverance, a Reflection – 22/01/20

    I urge myself to persevere. It is the only possible route to take. Of course, wallowing and huddling in bed is an option, but it’s not one I would readily like to select. One can only indulge in so much melancholy and shutting oneself off from the world until enough is enough. It’s time to get up, get out, speak loudly, with sumptuous sounds and absorb all that life is offering. And once out of bed, dressed and ready to exit my home – alone, mind you, I am rarely alone – and I take the first step outside that I’ve made in days. I’ve been holed up inside the house writing poem upon frustrated poem, with vicious words and synergies, and little positive to say.
 
But now, outside, the wind rushes around my face and my body, whipping my shoulder length hair that’s been begging for a cut for weeks, perhaps even months. I take in the sumptuous feeling, it’s as though I’m in the eye of the storm and I am the axis around which everything of this wind’s rich tone colours are centring. I throw my arms outward with abandon — who knew such a feeling was awaiting me? The power of Nature’s amazing force, right here before, behind, all around me. And I feel as though I’m being cleansed, vacuumed away of the negativity, the solid space that wreaked my interior for the last durations, times which I cannot take back. Only can I learn from them.

Playful now becomes the mood, and I laughingly pronounce an rrr, rrr, rrr, to try my voice again. My imagination presents me a playful slick seal begging to be rubbed on his belly or his back, his whiskers tickling my cheeks as, in my mind, I give him a big kiss upon his face. He does not turn away, he pokes out his tongue instead, and joins in with the Rrrrrrr’s of being pleased in the moment, and finally I realise I’ve done it, with this wind, with this amazingly fresh gusting breeze, with my odd imagination, I am cleansed and revitalised once more, no need for aggressive expressions, no need, anymore.

© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
All images signed “LMH”
are copyrighted 2019-2020 by Lauren M. Hancock
and all rights reserved.

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  • Poem: “I am enough” – 12/01/20

    Poem: “I am enough” – 12/01/20

     I am enough the way I am, she scrawls over and over
 on the draft paper for algebra which 
 she really has no use for, 
 her math is terrible, best use 
 the sheets as they are to scratch and scrawl.
 Enough, enough, enough,
 she traces the letters, feeds the words,
 perhaps one day another person she’ll enthrall.
  
 An understanding that if she writes the phrase 
 often enough it’ll ring true,
 a sudden belief structure then reverently erected 
 like a mosque or a church
 present to preserve self-acceptance 
 and worship of her own worth
 for she does not accept these words, 
 round and round her calligraphy swirls.
  
 Empty loops and hollow introspection exist,
 to her, she is nothing right now, she is yet to become.
 The ink drags along with her flowing hand,
 reflections of prior motions, 
 self-directions.
  
 But enough, enough! with this self-pity and deep sadness,
 at a lack of acknowledgement for 
 her true internal development,
 she is enough, 
 always has been,
 always will,
 so saddening she needed to ink the phrase upon her skin. 
  
 Because now the mark speaks of how 
 she believed she was not enough,
 so much so that, insecurity rose and drowned her,
 to pay someone to mark her for life,
 with words in a calligraphy that was not mine. 
  
 © 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
 All images signed “LMH” 
 are copyrighted 2019-2020 by Lauren M. Hancock 
 and all rights reserved. 

 Photo by Bich Tran from Pexels

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  • Poem: “I am enough” – 12/01/20

    Poem: “I am enough” – 12/01/20

     I am enough the way I am, she scrawls over and over
 on the draft paper for algebra which 
 she really has no use for, 
 her math is terrible, best use 
 the sheets as they are to scratch and scrawl.
 Enough, enough, enough,
 she traces the letters, feeds the words,
 perhaps one day another person she’ll enthrall.
  
 An understanding that if she writes the phrase 
 often enough it’ll ring true,
 a sudden belief structure then reverently erected 
 like a mosque or a church
 present to preserve self-acceptance 
 and worship of her own worth
 for she does not accept these words, 
 round and round her calligraphy swirls.
  
 Empty loops and hollow introspection exist,
 to her, she is nothing right now, she is yet to become.
 The ink drags along with her flowing hand,
 reflections of prior motions, 
 self-directions.
  
 But enough, enough! with this self-pity and deep sadness,
 at a lack of acknowledgement for 
 her true internal development,
 she is enough, 
 always has been,
 always will,
 so saddening she needed to ink the phrase upon her skin. 
  
 Because now the mark speaks of how 
 she believed she was not enough,
 so much so that, insecurity rose and drowned her,
 to pay someone to mark her for life,
 with words in a calligraphy that was not mine. 
  
 © 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
 All images signed “LMH” 
 are copyrighted 2019-2020 by Lauren M. Hancock 
 and all rights reserved. 

 Photo by Bich Tran from Pexels

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  • My Reflections on Blogging in 2019 – 01/01/20

    My Reflections on Blogging in 2019 – 01/01/20

    I was so excited to start a page on WordPress when I joined in July 2019. Though I’ve had other blogs before, this was to be something in which I showcased mainly my art, rather than my words. I loved writing little funny stories to go along with my illustrations and felt the sense of community within this platform while I shared. People were supportive of my words and illustrations and this made me feel welcomed. I am so thankful for my readers, past and present, for reading and enjoying what I have to share. I really am so grateful for your support.

    Then I published my first book Our Whimsical World a few months into having my blog, which was such an amazing experience. Working with my editor Ben helped me learn many different things about self publishing and I am so grateful for his support and expertise.

    Shortly thereafter, I began to sway away from writing moral stories or stories about animals or people which were amusing or thought provoking and had some form of message attached to them. I began to focus on writing and posting poetry, which I feel comfortable with and enjoy writing. I was worried that readers would not respond well to the change of tone and style of my blog, given that I had written so many of the short stories/flash fiction with illustrations that were light-hearted and such, but in a way, perhaps I needn’t have worried.

    Then, nearing the end of December, I decided to remove Alice Well as the name of my website, the artistic name I was known as, and reclaim my site under my own name. I felt it was time to do so, especially as I am going in a different direction with my poetry. There was the possibility that going from one identity to myself may have caused problems and initial confusion, but I felt it was the right thing to do.

    I think that when it comes to altering one’s posts or style in which they post, it just takes time for it to be accepted. I know that my readers are still here, and while I may have lost some readers because of the more personal style in which I am writing, I know that others will view my work and it may resonate with them too. It’s just a matter of pushing on, finding the right niche in which to sit, and allowing myself to be transparent and open to those who stumble upon my words, or follow them already. In life, there are endless tales to be told, it is just the manner in which one constructs the body of it that makes it whole.

    Thank you for being part of my 2019 and I look forward to seeing you in 2020!

    Love,

    Lauren

    Photo copyrighted 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.

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