I am enough the way I am, she scrawls over and over
on the draft paper for algebra which
she really has no use for,
her math is terrible, best use
the sheets as they are to scratch and scrawl.
Enough, enough, enough,
she traces the letters, feeds the words,
perhaps one day another person she’ll enthrall.
An understanding that if she writes the phrase
often enough it’ll ring true,
a sudden belief structure then reverently erected
like a mosque or a church
present to preserve self-acceptance
and worship of her own worth
for she does not accept these words,
round and round her calligraphy swirls.
Empty loops and hollow introspection exist,
to her, she is nothing right now, she is yet to become.
The ink drags along with her flowing hand,
reflections of prior motions,
But enough, enough! with this self-pity and deep sadness,
at a lack of acknowledgement for
her true internal development,
she is enough,
always has been,
so saddening she needed to ink the phrase upon her skin.
Because now the mark speaks of how
she believed she was not enough,
so much so that, insecurity rose and drowned her,
to pay someone to mark her for life,
with words in a calligraphy that was not mine.
© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
All images signed “LMH”
are copyrighted 2019-2020 by Lauren M. Hancock
and all rights reserved.
Photo by Bich Tran from Pexels
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