I’m depleted of it.
Instead, replaced is a feeling of desolation within my being,
a rolling stone headed for the bottom of a hill
to crash into nothingness with no witnesses.
Alone is how I feel,
empty of the ideal chase which I sought to counsel myself
in order to become a better person,
to develop into something amazing,
someone who will strike others positively upon meeting.
I want that aura that speaks to whomever is in contact with me and it,
a feeling bursting with affection and timely truth,
I want so much more, but I cannot articulate it,
I understand that to reveal all would be foolish.
But I have not withheld much during my angry moments,
my words which slashed and divided,
into pretty little ugly pieces that just weren’t meant for
I’ll tell you,
I want to create something out of bliss.
The time for angst and anger has passed, I do believe,
they have had their trial by jury,
and they have been committed to the ward for lifetime insanity,
Perhaps they’ll return again in due course,
but for now I will immerse myself in the scents of lavender and ylang-ylang,
A curious mixture but one which permits further healing.
© 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
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