Poem: Deliberate Change – 17/09/21

reduction of meds equals reduction of stability you’re questioned whether what you’re doing is right for you but I know it’s important to get this poison out of my system to slowly cleanse myself of it it’s been soaking my mind tainting my equilibrium. it can’t be healthy to be on high doses for years and years – when you are struggling the most, perhaps it’s important to have these as bandages to cotton wool my mind with white fluffy woollen balls but I need the reality of living without so much chemical restraint I’m just taking matters into my own hands it’s only weeks that I am not going to wait. the edginess in reduction is the worst part the raw red feeling of being scraped against a venomous spiked ceiling being dragged upside down feeling discomfort, exhaustion to the highest degree this dose has been with me for years I’m getting rid of it perhaps a little too fast, deplete it from me, just damned well leave my system, let me breathe. Copyright © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.

Prose Poetry: Elusive Sleep – 03/08/21

Elusive Sleep Sleep. How it escapes, evades my very fingertips. When I reach out, fingernails scrabbling, hoping for a hint of rest, my aching heavy lids are calling. I am in a state of unrest, my mind is anything but heightened, I need the numbness to wash over me, repair the intensity from the day prior. I need to rest, but, I cannot, I cannot will myself into a state of slumber. Sometimes I am stubborn and don’t wish for the darkened cover, for haven in darkness, dangling from consciousness’ precipice until the web is severed, and I’m beneath, in the lake of swimming nightmares with the rest of them. [...]

Poem: Stagnated Time – 01/05/21

The minutes seem so long, the second-hand drags likefingernails in sand and broken glass,I'm impatient to know the answer,but I'm terrified to even ask. Tell me, what point is therein waiting, in watching the vapour of my breathcloud my vision, obscure with fog?The truth we will discover yet. I refuse to beg or sob. Ache [...]

Poem: PRN – 26/01/21

Look what they’ve done, prescribed those tiny bullets, dissolving, smoking gun. The lacklustre effect is taking, lethargy, it is growing, malaise, it is not helping, boy, these tablets are not assisting. But perhaps they’ll calm the mind in due time, relax, replenish, make the thoughts intertwine, as though ivy would, or thin rope, [...]

Poem: Brightness – 17/01/21

Brightness engulfs that wicked room where tales were never shared. Where fears, anxiety, irreverently unfold within the gloom, resting concerns upon one’s hands. There is a quietness which is perturbed by the stately arrival of glaring white and unnatural upheaval, a certain something, a funk, a stink, which would bring one to their knees, into the darkest of thickets, the tangled thorns, the trees, the thistles. [...]

Poem: The Girl in the Red Dress – 07/01/21

Glaring, inquiring eyes inspecting through shopfront windows, what is it you seek? The girl in the crimson dress with white seams, is it she you are trying to find, do you desire her to speak? On edge, percolated by excess caffeine, anxiety rising, scenes perhaps more than what they seem, to her, everything seems suspicious, laden with layers of notions and commotions and terribly haunting dreams. [...]

Poem: Quelled – 22/08/20

Night time should promise depth, and warmth, and promises, whispers of sweet tomorrows, and tight caresses, dreams, and deep rest, instead: three hour’s sleep, then wide awake in the same evening, sleeping for half hour shifts, then rising, eyes searching for the time, wishing it were later, silently begging.   This sleep pattern is skewed, [...]