Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose

Tag: resilience

  • poem: the lake – 11/03/22

    poem: the lake – 11/03/22

    amazing though is this air I breathe
    wanton duck melodies from the lake
    make me sing
    their quacks and quacks speak of more
    than what’s implied by them
    with a dear friend around the lake I
    take a turn and admire ducks, smile at happy mothers,
    children, and puppies with men.
    I am animated, she listens with quiet calm,
    by her side, I need no longer need take her arm,
    for days of physical support are not near,
    there’s nothing to help me, nor there to fear,
    while anxiety can burden, it’s not featuring here.
    Our friendship, o’er long years,
    with gaps, sliced by angled swords,
    the silences lingered, anger had been present,
    could be heard,
    but through it all, a line of devotion and loyalty,
    illness an immutable thread
    but never each other’s enemies.
    She will always be my friend, she’d said,
    words which touch me now and blessed me then,
    a slight choking of the throat at gratitude from a
    wondrous, forgiving woman,
    for friendship with myself, would not have been
    the easiest to keep sealed,
    my angered mouth bubbled over at times,
    but she remained with great devotion still.
    I am not a goddess, I am not someone to be revered,
    I am not a higher being, I am simply myself –
    and when in the mood, other characters,
    so self-assured,
    but in the end, I am me, myself, and
    there’s nothing from that which can decline,
    to some I am the apple of their eye,
    and to some, they wish for me to evade their current times.
    I’ll focus on my loved ones, and kind friends such as she,
    there until the end, together, even in absence and solitude,
    her momentary absence not a mystery.
    I will and do understand her occasional need to pull away,
    gaze at the lake, with quietness away from my chirping
    and tunes,
    a moment’s peace, a mindful exercise,
    then returning by my side for the conversation
    to be properly seen through.
    © 2022 Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose. All rights reserved.
    March 2022
    Photo taken by myself.

  • poem: still here despite it all – (repost from another platform) – 01/03/22

    poem: still here despite it all – (repost from another platform) – 01/03/22

    ~~~~~Still Here Despite it All~~~~~~
    © 2022 Lauren M. Hancock
    what is it about me that this some of this world seems to abhor? Am I not immaculate enough, in and of myself, to be considered something sightly and toward? Someone worthy of being heard? Of not being ostracised, unread, too? Am I something so abhorrent that they cannot understand my illness, that this decrepit twin which attaches itself to me during delusions and paranoia and versions of heightened moods, exists, my flagrant mania? Is there no care, concern, nor empathy to be viewed, to be seen? I feel just a walking ghost, with a gust of wind who shouldn’t matter at all, I slide through loosely hung sheets, trailing my stature because to them, I’m no longer seen, and I am not whining, nor crying, nor languishing, or despairing, I am simply making a point that I feel I’m not here yet again.

    But it shouldn’t matter for this is my own path, forging ahead is the pathway to choose, I choose to continue, I desire to be seen, to be heard, and if I can’t, if I’m such a joke then why is it that when those whom I love hear my creations, my poems, my words, they are impressed, surely I’m not being humoured by all, that their words are to me a version of being blessed? No, this cannot be the case with all. I do not believe it to be as such, I know I can in thrall.

    I can make my mark, in my main world I already have, and if this is how I’m met elsewhere, with hostility and dangerous eyes, and allusions, and insinuations which are mean and cruel and unkind, well, dears, I will still continue on my path, it’s not even a fight. It’s a means of reckoning with myself, telling, assuring myself that I am worthy of freedom, expression, and here, those foes, once-friends, there is nothing more important here, nothing more, if anything, than this I will put on the pulse. I was ill. I should not have to make amends. Feel my heartbeat, I am still here, breathing and living, and I will not allow others to dictate my fall. I can do that all by myself, and through experience I have learned to soar so well.

    01/03/22
    © 2022 Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose. All rights reserved.
    (c) 2022 my own photo

  • Poem: disarmed – 12/12/21

    Poem: disarmed – 12/12/21

    change is as impermanent as the irreverent footsteps
    brushing against the floorboards  
    then carpeted pavement
    travelling toward the bedroom door for a glimmer
    of your strength as your heart it beats quietly in slumber
    days well spent days well spent
    I sigh to myself for I see the journey within your nightly trials
    in your eyes sparkles glimmer
    alterations to be observed and saved
    soul shimmers

    you altered your life path
    you designed a new trial to be outlasted and
    mistakes made wittingly
    aside and cast
    you grew in redemption
    a beautiful soul reflection
    sewn regeneration
    flowering ascension
    imperfect connections
    yet perfect corrections
    as bold and wondrous as the claret flowing through
    your bursting spirit
    your special soul
    need I, dare I mention?
    the colours of your fall,
    the shade of your winter soul,
    the spring in your flowering steps,
    the beautiful summer sunset,
    you are evolving as you become the centre,
    the One,
    I’m torn – do I let you sleep
    or wake you, embrace you,
    snuffling warmth?

    I just want to encourage you
    congratulate you
    for the change that’s become of you
    your flight path
    nothing to fear
    no harm,
    you’ve made it through the danger zone
    and blissfully
    grinningly
    I see you hovering and soaring above
    that former storm.
    well done, my lovely,
    well done.
    my heart you have eternally disarmed.  
    (09/12/21)
    Copyright © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.

    Previous Post: personal astronomy – 12/12/21

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  • Poem: a land of complications – 06/11/21

    Poem: a land of complications – 06/11/21

    positively brightening
    what is there to come?
    a world of complications? But a heart won’t come undone
    I learn from each mistake, take on life lessons at hand,
    and understanding every moment has its consequence,
    I’m more well-equipped, skills at hand.

    I know that I should be strong
    I know that certain pathways were wrong
    I understand that the future is bright
    if I accept it, in a way to behold,
    because there’s nothing wrong
    with being myself and more
    so we shall not bother to deal with any
    reckoning from others about my soul.

    I am quieter, I am softer, I am gentler and this
    is the truth,
    from bombastic to controlled,
    I guess tiring was the former view,
    to be something more with the click of
    a finger, is this what the aim is for?
    My demeanour tender,
    I will rise above and beyond,
    I already am, already have,
    I’m sure,

    the devil’s in the details but no mention
    needed of him,
    because I can see my future,
    and well, let me tell you,
    there are things I want and need,
    come to fruition,
    growth from mere seeds,
    slowly, slowly, sure,
    I will traverse this land of complications,
    allow me to see this through.
    (06/11/21)
    Copyright © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.

    Previous Post: illumination – 05/11/21

    Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose

  • Poem: Growth – 31/10/21

    Poem: Growth – 31/10/21

    sit and contemplate
    what is there to know
    what is there to share
    from what has been sown
    so much knowledge
    experience but they all
    lay in the past
    moving forward
    searching for more
    exploration, positive at last

    growing each day
    there’s no need to turn to dismay
    for moments of yesteryears are
    exactly that
    and improvement, well, what is there to fear?
    I can grow exponentially if I only desire to try
    and by God I am trying and succeeding
    each day, with every breath I reach and fly

    soaring for the moment
    it’s as though there is magic in my potions
    assisting me to becoming the best that I can be
    it didn’t happen immediately
    and not without great effort
    but once I put my mind to it, dedicated myself
    created positive habits
    then things fell into place
    results began to show
    any with any motivational action
    I felt my heart know
    that the path which I was, am, taking
    is the right one for me,
    to become better
    more
    improved
    the right version of little old me.
    (31/10/21)
    Copyright © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.

    Photo by Monica Turlui on Pexels.com

    Previous Post: A Fateful Meeting – 30/10/21

    Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose

  • Poem: Not Worth The Upsets – 21/09/21

    Poem: Not Worth The Upsets – 21/09/21

    Deliver me from the evils that await at the hands of certain beings,
    an understanding that what they project in life is the pain they’ve already been suffering,
    or a notion that the signs they exhibit are the nastiness wrought within their souls,
    perhaps they’ve been hurt already, perhaps they just have a cruel heart,
    perhaps we won’t know at all.

    But the missing pieces of the puzzle won’t inextricably fall into place,
    in fact, they might fall by the wayside under their devil’s sweeping cape,
    little minds who wish to play games may think theirs are engorged,
    but let me tell you this, dear friends,
    I believe bullying behaviour is extremely untoward.

    It’s as though they want to ruin another for their sheer pleasure,
    a wreaking of revenge because an ego became snowed under,
    I am the process, I am the deliverer,
    I will not allow myself from useless words to suffer.

    Stronger than the poison that seeps from veins,
    a fighter within,
    I shall never emit to them the words ‘je t’aime’,
    unworthy of my belligerence,
    untimely expulsions from my spirit,
    my perturbed soul,
    now I know,
    they weren’t worth the upsets at all.
    Copyright © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.

    Image source

    Previous Post: Obsidian – 19/09/21

    Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose

  • Poem: Luminous – 22/07/21

    Poem: Luminous – 22/07/21

    I am brightness within eyes and
    air between wings,
    rise with me,
    moods heightened,
    how amazing salvation is.

    I have been forgiven and it was
    granted many years before,
    acceptance, realisation,
    have long been in the making,
    my life, my world,
    I now treasure, I adore.

    Acknowledgement of the
    gravity of my former situations,
    I know now how darkly luminous my fate glowed,
    insinuations,
    whilst glowering were heavy eyes
    above my form,
    their unhappy windows,
    but still they watched over me,
    for then, for future tomorrows –

    I had protection from angels,
    from generations of loved ones,
    from heaven above,
    and the benevolent calming God.

    How else could I describe my survival —
    triumphs over tribulations,
    scraped stifling walls for air,
    learned to be humble,
    in reality, I could be away from here,
    six feet under,
    or scattered in pieces,
    what a moment to comprehend,
    how one might shudder.

    I lived under calculated stares,
    by some, I suspect I was abhorred,
    raging thoughts,
    temporary damning thunder,
    they’ve forgotten with time,
    softness beneath me grows,
    a sense of quiet personal power.

    An important being to some, to many?
    Yet to others, a nameless entity,
    and now here I am,
    within the arms of comfortability,
    of safety,
    and most grateful I am,
    gracious in Life’s undertaking,
    because I know,
    I understand,
    I comprehend that my place within this world
    is something to respect,
    for I have been spared from a fate
    potentially dared and wiped,
    into nothingness I would have become,

    obliterated,
    faceless, lost,

    yet here I am,
    saved,
    like a turtledove
    I have returned to the flock.

    I am at one with them,
    I am treasured,
    I am youthful yet I am growing old,
    life is amazing once I’ve accepted it,
    truth be told:

    of its glorious moments
    there are so many forthcoming, past and current,
    of Life’s glorious abundance,
    I am sold.

    © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
    Photo by Monica Turlui from Pexels

    Previous Post: ‘Waltz’ – 20/07/21

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  • Poem: No Lamenting – 12/06/21

    Poem: No Lamenting – 12/06/21

    Do not come here to lament,
    it is not eulogy time.
    This is cause for celebration,
    poignant moments of her life.

    Allow me to demonstrate
    why the need to weep
    has passed,
    maturity, acceptance, understanding,
    instead of mourning,
    she’d want us to
    leap, to dance.

    To gain favour
    to her memories,
    spin! she was strong
    with her words,
    the values of her heart,

    she speaks her mind,
    doesn’t allow thoughts to fester,
    knowing when and where
    they will grow,
    from an echoing room,
    negativity can depart.

    Into the depths
    where we can explore,
    no reasons to judge
    nor deplore,
    she’d tell me to
    live life to the full,
    without her I’d be empty,
    that is a certainty, for sure.

    Plutonian measures
    devastatingly linger in the gloom,
    take me back to that moment,
    that instance,
    when peace and love had
    already been, had grown, so pure.

    Do not come here to lament,
    for she is here,
    with us,
    precious time,
    lovingly ours and forevermore
    will our tales remain intertwined.

    © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
    Image Pixabay on Pexels

    Previous Post: ‘The Essentials’ – 11/06/21

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  • Poem: I Do Not Exist, I Live – 15/02/21

    Poem: I Do Not Exist, I Live – 15/02/21

    Sing to myself, I will this day, 
    there is nothing to perturb me, 
    my worries they have been laid away. 

    I do not exist, I live, 
    broadly speaking I experience, 
    I take, I give, 
    my heart yearns for nothing, 
    I am complete because I’ve accepted the truth of myself,
    I’m growing more comfortable in my skin. 

    Strength comes from knowing who I am, 
    visions come from planning through resilience, 
    I am no longer weakness walking, 
    the insecurities forthcoming, 
    I do not rely on another to complete or fix me, 
    the notion of this unsettles me. 

    Because, being independent mentally, 
    and emotionally, shall we say,
    it is, in itself something wondrous to look upon after
    endless helpless days, 
    I won’t suffer, I won’t be useless with myself, 
    I have courage and ardour, 
    I’ve grown and I don’t need another to leap in 
    to take me as their prize 
    when I’ve worked so hard to develop myself
    for years, not days. 

    © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved. 
    Photo by Noah Silliman on Unsplash

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  • Poem: The Good Fight – 23/09/20

    Poem: The Good Fight – 23/09/20

    You have it within you.
    The ability to push through,
    with determination,
    with resolve,
    with power,
    without the assistance of another.

    You can do it, brother, sister,
    you can achieve these goals.
    You can achieve your goals,
    even with extenuating circumstances,
    don’t you know?

    Though sadness, lack of resolve,
    impatience may linger,
    cast these aside, because, you know,
    they are of an indelicate picture,
    instead fulfil yourself with the richness of
    scarlet reds,
    of peacock and cobalt blues,
    ceruleans,
    crimson,
    yellow, yellow,
    bright sunshine to view.

    Embrace the moment when your mind says,
    “I have had enough”
    of this negativity, which not only swarmed,
    but threatened to cause you to leave,
    the perpetual darkness that was present,
    looming yet sinister and dormant within your soul.
    Those parts of you which you do not
    show, and neither speak of,
    it’s not time to be gawked at,
    stared at,
    it is instead time to achieve and heal.

    And heal you may,
    you will,
    you’ll achieve so much because I know
    you’re going to put your mind to it
    and your heart and soul in it,
    and soon enough,
    in the blink of an eye,
    I’ll see your name in lights,
    and the fluttering butterflies in my belly
    will keep soaring,
    they last only three days,
    but damn, let them make the most of it.

    © 2020 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
    Photo by Justin DoCanto on Unsplash

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