Poem: Tepid – 01/10/21

I remember when life was tepid, unenthusiastic,
carried little warmth,
I remember being feeling disconnected
from the world in and of itself,
that I was a victim of many circumstances,
not one,
that others were targeting me,
I was unlucky or such or some,
I remember feeling different,
that I was never accepted that much,
never right,
never really enough.

But today, I realise it’s taken a turnaround,
life experiences, changes of thoughts and memories,
interpretations of many instances,
I’m not hung, nor swinging in the trees,
feeling distress or like I am lacking
in certain privileges or others,
in fact, I’ve been blessed with much in this life,
now that I can see, now that I’ve acknowledged,
now that I’ve bothered.

No longer feeling a victim of my thoughts,
depression and sadness do not loom,
they do not encompass my bedroom, my breath,
do not taint as though a noxious gloom,
in fact, I am grateful for so many things,
friends, life, family, happiness, small things that others won’t,
can neither personally feel nor see,
for I am flying, free as a bird,
in my emotions I am soaring high with my wings.

The enormity of the understanding that I needed to
change my thought patterns,
that I just had to alter my wingspan to catch the wind
of others’ perspectives, learnings to carry upon myself,
to be absorbed by my ears, dutifully heard,
and carried through to my heart,
feel the beat-beating like a drum,
reminding me I am alive,
I have survived so much and now,
I am here for the joyous ride.

Tepid no longer is life to me,
I am grateful, so gracious in accepting what is
presented to me,
I shall make the most of every opportunity,
and learn from the mistakes I make,
alter belief patterns if need be,
and continue on being the change,
that my life
needed to inhale, exhale, with deep relaxation,
I heavily sigh,
freedom of choice,
of living is awaiting me,
wide wingspan so beautiful I want to weep,
not a single eye shall remain dry,
my spirit, finally it is free.

Copyright © 2021 Lauren M. Hancock. All rights reserved.
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Lauren M. Hancock Poetry and Prose